As the sun was just cresting the horizon, turning the sky orange-pink-lavender-blue, I sat near the doorway of the cave-like alter at the heart of Thiksay Monastery. From a peak around 13,000 feet above sea level, each morning the Tibetan Buddhist monks send out meditations of loving compassion to all sentient beings, and I had the honor to join them summer of 2017 in Ladakh, India. Although it was summer, the morning had a chill crisp to the air, and the smell of incense blanketed us while the monks filled the space with vibrations of ancient Tibetan chants. The sounds felt as if they permeated my body. They both grounded me and kept me alert. I closed my eyes and let the experience wash over me, as if bathing in their prayers. I turned my attention to the felt sense of my body and asked that my body be at ease. Observing my breath, I invited a sense of calm. And then—as if spontaneously—a spark of joy rose within me. The more I sat with the aliveness of joy, the clearer it became, and the more the feeling expanded. It was a light that had started deep within, and began to shine out.
In the Yoga Sutras of Patanjali it states:
1.33 Maitri karuna mudita upeksanam sukha duhkha punya apunya visayanam bhavanatah cittaprasadanam
Through the cultivation of friendliness, compassion, joy, and indifference to pleasure and pain, virtue and vice respectively, the consciousness becomes favorably disposed, serene, and benevolent.
Upon reflection of this sutra, B.K.S Iyengar says that it “invites us to rejoice with the happy, to be compassionate to the sorrowful, friendly with the virtuous, and indifferent to those who continue to live in vice despite attempts to change.” It asks us to cultivate a sense of kindness so that we align with a positive disposition, setting our hearts and minds at ease, inviting in gentleness and compassion toward ourselves and others.
This past summer marked my 10 year anniversary with New York City. Living here has opened me up to see that we are all in this life together. As we weather the seasons and streets together, there is a unique opportunity to engage with the souls around us on a daily basis. If we choose to move throughout our day wishing those we see our joy, then we are able to both empower and uplift our own experience as well as those around us. Anais Nin is credited with the great insight,
“We don’t see things as they are. We see things as we are.”
The lens through which we look at the world colors our experience. And so, taking the time to align ourselves with love, kindness, joy, and compassion can help cultivate an attitude of seeing the world around us in that same light. The ancient practice of Metta (Loving-Kindness) Meditation offers us the tools to experience the world from this state of love. Below are some suggestions for how to incorporate this practice into your daily life.
Loving Kindness Meditation Practice
The practice of loving kindness meditation is found in both Buddhism as Metta (Pali) and in Vedic texts as Maitri (Sanskrit). The benefits of the practice elicit a positive disposition, ease tendencies toward depression and anxiety, as well as allow the practitioner to feel a sense of connection with the world around them.
I invite you to practice this meditation in a quiet space for 15 to 20 minutes.
First, take a comfortable seat, and allow the body to settle into an easeful state. Let your heart soften and your breath flow calmly as you recite inwardly to yourself the following phrases:
May I be filled with lovingkindness.
May I be safe from inner and outer dangers.
May I be well in body and mind.
May I be at ease and happy.
As you continue to repeat these phrases, you might picture yourself being filled with this state of love, even recalling upon a time when you felt loved. Hold that feeling and observe what these phrases bring up in you. Being kind toward yourself and without judgement, notice all that arises: physical sensations, visuals, colors, thoughts, etc, and then come back to the mantra. Work with these phrases until you feel connected to the love and compassion within yourself.
After illuminating your own being with this light, offer to it out to someone you love. Hold the image of this person as you say to yourself:
May you be filled with lovingkindness.
May you be safe from inner and outer dangers.
May you be well in body and mind.
May you be at ease and happy.
As you gradually allow the awareness of love to expand, you may begin to offer these wishes to the difficult people in your life. Sending them, too, love, safety, balance, and peace.
At times, this practice can feel difficult, and even bring up some hard emotions. If this happens, try and meet yourself with love and acceptance, as if you were your own best friend. If it feels like too much to send the loving wishes toward yourself at first, start with someone you love, a friend, a family member, even a pet.
Whether from the high peaks of the Himalayas, or walking through the busy streets of New York City, you can use this meditation anywhere. As you silently practice among people, notice how your mood may change as you come to experience the world in a new light. This practice will help you stay connected to your heart, infusing your perspective with the potential of loving kindness.
What we see is what we are. What we are is love.